Category Archives: Rants

Unknown's avatar

Vick Doesn’t Matter

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Or how about shouldn’t matter, not this much. It seems everyone is a little too worked up about the dogs. I’m late even getting out an opinion at this point. But I didn’t expect it to blow up into the talk of the preseason. Hey, don’t get me wrong. I like dogs. I love dogs. Fines and jail time, that’s the law. Suspension from the game? Y’all think that’s appropriate, fine.

But what about these guys?
I had no idea until I read this article: Last Days – The Stranger
Take a look at the first bullet point.

These guys beat their PREGNANT wives and were not punished by the NFL. Dogs don’t matter to me that much. Without the original article I’m having trouble finding all the ramifications, but does it make sense?

does not equal unequal
www.greenville.k12.sc.us

The whole problem is a typical one with regard to our sports heroes, that of uproar and unpopular actions getting in the way of equal treatment and correct punishments. We can be mad about the dogs, we can let the law handle the punishment for the rules he broke. But football is his job. And if others don’t get kept from working after abuse (on people), what sense does that make? Let the man play. We can be mad, sure. We can let him apologize to PETA. But there’s a line that I’d like drawn that separates the man and the ball player.

Unknown's avatar

Swimwear Related Stress Disorder

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There is no way I can comprehend how hard it is to find a bathing suit in August. August is supreme swim suit wearing time. It’s still hot out. It’s summer in some places…

Not all of us are going “back to school”. Frankly, I don’t even know why that’s an excuse for new clothes. Whatever. But Macy’s, surely your store is big enough to keep the swimwear around. As a matter of fact, I believe there should be a small permanent display. Some of us travel to exotic locales even in the winter, it’s crazy, I know.

The other SRSD problem I have is the top/bottom issue. Can’t every store keep the ups and downs together? I don’t want just a bottom, I’m not going to Greece every year. It’s not that hard. If someone buys a XXL bottom and small top, don’t make fun of how they look, just put those leftovers to the side. I don’t like ruffling through them. I need both pieces, on one hanger.

You are lucky that I did find the perfect suit. I didn’t even know that there was a much better looking top until I got home and found it on the internet. You are lucky at least I only paid clearance prices, or I might just go order it and save it for after this trip. Last minute shoppers shouldn’t have to pay this kind of a price for hotness. I wouldn’t have spent the whole summer convincing myself that last years suit was okay if I knew how hard this last minute change of heart would be. It’s unconscionable.

Unknown's avatar

Biggest Loser, For A Minute

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It appears sad but true that my awe inspiring weight loss show is not all happiness. There’s apparently cheating and cheap tricks and people regaining it all shortly after the show.

Diet Blog posted this about the show.

I know sometimes you read, but you don’t listen…

If you don’t go there, check out this Time Magazine link, at least. (It’s short…)

It really proves that even with all the help in the world, the idea of losing more than ONE POUND A WEEK is unreasonable. We have to have patience with what we are trying to do to our bodies, whether it’s losing weight, gaining weight, or making any dream come true.

biggest loser logo
www.realitytvmagazine.com

Unknown's avatar

Photo Limits = Grouchy Blogger

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Talk about frustrating. I was all about this flickr thing, and had organized all my pictures and started to upload them. So now, I’m trying snapfish.

sfish.jpg
I should be going backwards to add to the appropriate posts, but then I bet that you wouldn’t even look at them:

Flickr – Seattle Memorial Day Weekend – that’s the pics that are cute but are not Sasquatch from when everyone was here. I’ve added some more recently.

Snapfish – Sasquatch – I bet you can figure out what those are. There’s no place for explanations, but they’re either of us, the music, or the view…

Snapfish – Fremont Fair – this is for the post I never wrote. It would have gone a little like this:

Maybe 78704 is Austin style hippie, but Fremont is pretty far out there too. The parade is to celebrate the ‘Soulstice’, so there’s a parade of nekkid bicyclers, and then a huge parade of more stuff that makes even less sense. If it looks a little strange, that’s because nothing could be motorized or not recyclable. Earth friendly parade. It was certainly the most crowded event that I’ve been to in Seattle, and very interesting. You can see the one picture of a crowded street, and there was also a car show of strange cars. The clouds towards the end of the afternoon looked like rain so I headed home instead of to the end celebration at Gas Works Park, but I had seen plenty.

Hope you enjoy!!

Unknown's avatar

Then We Were There

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Reflections on the road trip: We had a great time seeing the sights and driving up through the northwest. MK is the worst side seat driver of all time, so I was happiest when he was sleeping. He also kept me committed to my diet by not allowing any junk food to be consumed in the car. Isn’t that terrible? We had Oatmeal breakfast bars, grocery store sandwiches, and plain almonds for snacks. Dinner would be more sandwiches and bars. To me, road trips aren’t real unless they include McDonalds (esp. for breakfast) and chex mix and cokes and slurpees and honey roasted sugar coated peanuts. But Noooooo. MK was convinced that the eating out we did the week before while saying our goodbyes more than negated this past 6 months that I’ve spent committing to working out and losing ten pounds. He is still waiting for me to thank him.

We roll up into Seattle on a cool bridge that goes through a cliff or something. And there is a traffic jam. Good start, huh? We are about 3 hours early for the realtor that is letting us in our place, so we drive around the city to see what we can see. It comes up on lunch time and we start to look for a place. There is nothing within 30 miles of our new place, as we drive by and around over and over, where we can eat and park the car. Hmm. We pull into “Taco Time” just because they have a lot. MK thinks it will be fine. I think it is not taco time. I was right, and it will never, ever again be taco time as long as I live. Suffice to say, without elaborating: yuck, yuck, yuck.

We still have time, and in my SUPER SWEET AUSTIN PERSONALITY THAT THINKS THAT EVERYONE IS FRIENDLY, I decide to run in to the lobby and ask where we can leave our car until it is time to meet our realtor. I have been driving. 10 hours. I have jeans and a striped shirt on. I even have makeup on. But WHAT does mr. works at the front desk tell me in his terrible accent? Basically that I couldn’t possibly be moving in to this luxurious downtown upscale residence. He looks me up and down and hands me his ‘card’ in case he can help me ‘clear up my confusion’. So help me, it was all I could do to get in the drivers seat and turn that bus around. MK is lucky he was there. I was irate.

Rant: Clearly, who do these people think they are that just LOOK at someone and make assumptions? You don’t know me! I could own the building! You just work in it. Can YOU afford to live there on your salary!?! Don’t get an attitude with me. I have never been so upset. The being in the car all day and being tired and cranky didn’t help. It took MK a long time to calm me down. We parked down by the south side bridges and walked along the north end of the international district. Me, of course, looking at my reflection everywhere trying to see just how bad and poor I looked, lest another Seattle-ite break my heart talking down to me.

Finally, it comes up on 4 and we head back. I’m not smiling. Our realtor lets us in and re-introduces us to the HELP. I get over that when I see our place. It’s just like the pictures.

Realtor leaves and we start taking things up. He let us know we were going to have to have a meeting with the HELP that they call ‘orientation’. As though all these rich snooty snootertons don’t know how to work an elevator…MK goes to the front desk to arrange it. Of course, he’s in an FC UK pressed polo, he gets no slack from jean-paul-conciergey. WHO THEN TURNS TO ME, AND ASKS MK “WHO IS SHE TO YOU?” I swear, friends, he is fixing to get a beat down.

We unpack most of the car and get hungry again. There is a Whole Foods a block away, so we load up on dinner and breakfast and head back. MK unpacks and organizes, I work on the closet and learning the new cable channels, and cook dinner. By the way, it was plenty sunny out, and we headed up to the roof. We had the wine dude at WF get us a WA red and white. We brought the red up there, and toasted to the view, the sunset, and me not murdering any helpless old gentlemen. I’m not sure if day one was a success or a devastation. I’m going to need more time.

roof.jpg

Yes, that’s our view from the roof. Click on it, it’s lovely.

Unknown's avatar

Cry Babies

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Don Imus is an old guy. With a radio show. Well, he used to be.

Who hasn’t called someone a ‘nappy headed ho’? I can get a little nappy when I go running. It’s normal. White or black, you can be nappy, and ho-y. Sheesh, men can be hos. I’d like to list the crybabies for you:

  • MSNBC
  • Steve Capus, NBC News division President
  • Bruce Gordon, former NAACP President
  • The Rev. Al Sharpton
  • The Rev. Jesse Jackson
  • Oprah Winfrey
  • American Express Co.,
  • Sprint Nextel Corp.,
  • Staples Inc.,
  • Procter & Gamble Co.,
  • General Motors Corp. — all pulling ads from Imus’ show indefinitely.
  • Edited-to-add Head On, per comments.
  • reporter Ron Allen
  • “Today” show’s Al Roker
  • Barack Obama
  • Hillary Clinton (right after Obama)

Obama? Seriously? Everyone gets all up in arms about something that wasn’t even meant to be heard. Does it particularly suit their cause to take a stance? Mistakes happen. The less we pay attention, the less they will happen and become offensive. I’m a severe proponent of ignoring things and letting them go away since the first airing of the episode of South Park that made me see that overusing a swear word takes away it’s sting. Feeding into anything makes it worse. The more sensitive we become to stupid remarks, the more they sting. It’s a bandwagon, and people crying are telling us they are on the side of ‘moral fiber’. I’m not racist. I have more moral fiber if I ignore it and move on, maybe donate to charity.

Imus does some good, too: As of 9 a.m., $450,000 had been pledged. Last year’s Radiothon raised a total of $2.9 million for the three charities — Tomorrows Children’s Fund, CJ Foundation for SIDS and the Imus Ranch.

If we all had to think before we did things, I might never have gotten married, bought those super cool sunglasses, or published this ‘insensitive’ post.

This is not the first time he’s made off color remarks. Here’s a couple interesting articles:

Newsday

NYTimes

Pass the Word

Click the picture thumbnail to see Hillary’s website:

rutgers.jpg

Should he have been fired? I don’t think so.

Rutgers girls are even over it now. So why all the fuss?

Unknown's avatar

I Got Implants

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Not to throw you off or get you too excited, that must be the nitrous talking – it’s not what you think. I went in to the dentist for what started out as a routine cleaning and found out there was this giant ruptured about-to-explode-all-over-my-face-tooth that needed to be extracted immediately.

I, of course, blame that on the crappy food in New Zealand, obviously I was served something that rots otherwise lovely teeth. We’re talking, got a sticker every trip to the dentist for years teeth. Hmpf.

Well, I’m a little lighter now, down one tooth. But then they IMPLANT you with BONE in your MOUTH but there’s still a HOLE and I have to go BACK and get some more FAKE TOOTH or something. Oh wait! I almost forgot to mention the STITCHES. In my face. Yuck.

This is what I think of when I think dentist:


www.garyandmegumi.com

And now you’re telling me I have to go BACK? There will be a total of three days like this one, where I have a mouth full of gauze and can’t talk and have bottles of Vicodin lying around and I’m eating soup and drinking water (not through a straw!). This is not my idea of a good time, folks.

Unknown's avatar

Writing Down The Bones

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There’s that little sidebar information about the novels and such that I’ve been getting into, which I assume that you’ve noticed. (Or are noticing now, I’ll wait, go ahead…)

Right. So, I haven’t made detailed comments on every book, and I feel as though I should let you know why that is.

1. That would be a lot of posts, I’m reading many many books lately.

2. I am a skilled book-picker-outer. If it’s up there, you should go buy it or ask to borrow it. It will be a good one.

3. Some of you (yeah, sorry to single you out) don’t know how to read if it isn’t a blog or an email.

4. Some of you (even worse than those in category #3) read – gasp – things like self help books and _____ for Dummies. Stop it.

Ironically enough, this will help you out a little if you’re in category #3. The book Writing Down the Bones was a gift from a client ages ago who was so impressed by me that he was convinced I would write a great book. He bought me this as a gift, for inspiration. And maybe also because he was all about meditation and there’s a little of that in there.

I implore you to check this book out. Even if you are not a writer, chances are you need a little order in your life, and this book will help. Every place she mentions ‘writer’ you could insert ‘stock broker’ or ‘checkout assistant’ and learn something.

find a good book
www.messiah.edu

Unknown's avatar

Marketing Secrets Revealed By Lotion

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MK and I have a favorite argument at about 1:30am. I’ll be spaced out on the couch watching an infomercial, for some big thing that you sit in or on or by, or just light and put on the counter, that makes you skinny. I will say something like, “I need that. That looks serious. Or, maybe I could invent something like that but smaller and get rich.”

MK launches into a TIRADE. It doesn’t matter that I was half asleep and not serious, the fact that my thoughts escaped my lips gives him permission.

HE is the expert on the fact that if ANYTHING, EVER, worked, than we would all know about it and everyone in the world would have one. Like a broom. Well, does everyone have a broom? Um, like a toilet. Everyone would use some version of that thing that worked. So none of it is any good, or we’d know about it. We’re Americans. With computers.

Last night, I thought about this as I watched the one for the ab blaster chair or whatever it was called. Right before I could pick up the phone MK kicked me out to make him dinner. At the store, I saw that Jergens tanning lotion.

This is my rebuttal to MK: I can’t tell you how many people I had to tell about this stuff. I bought it for snippy for her birthday. I heard about it from a friend. But I have never ever ever seen any testimony otherwise that it is perfect, which it is. No blogs, no Us Weekly reports, no CBS Evening News Headlines.

So, like always, wife:1, MK:0. And, come on over and try some Leptotrimspamax with me whenever.

*Jergens in no way endorses somegosoftly *

Unknown's avatar

Homeland Security

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I am still in shock because I haven’t really been able to celebrate, print, or otherwise laud the success of finishing my novel. The champagne is stuck in the fridge, waiting for my dad to get home from work before midnight…

So we’ll get to that later.

In case you are one of those crazy, pro-war, scared to travel people, I’d like to let you know that your husband can get all of your paperwork together and expedite you a passport. They even forge travel documents for you (for a price, of course) so that the turnaround time from the US government is faster. I don’t need to even be present, just provide photocopies of applications and documents. Witnesses, schmitnesses.

So, not only will I get to go to New Zealand after all, terrorists can have other people prepare international documents.

homeland security
www.willowpondlane.com