Double Fail

Guess how many days of yoga and blogging I accomplished?

30 reasons I don’t make New Years resolutions. Since that’s just plain sad, I’m going to throw myself in to this again. Yoga recommencing soon and a real resolution: No fast food in February.

I’ll keep you posted!

No regrets, though. So far 2011 is (you guessed it Momm) the best ever!

Take a look at all the books I’ve already read under the Books tab at the top. MK got me 1500.

Advertisements

Happy Birthday

What a great day! A little snow, a little work, a lot of fun, friends, food and partying. Can’t believe I’m “working” right now, trying to wow Ski Utah with videos on par with my original…

But I did get to enjoy some sushi, basically my only goal for the day. Good times. Last night we were out at midnight, I’m not too old yet! My phone battery died twice with all the notifications and texts from all my lovely friends. Feeling pretty good!

Posted from WordPress for Android

Another Birthday Month

Every year, January has been my birthday month.

That totally sounds retarded.

Every January, I celebrate my birthday for a month. That’s better.

It is my birthday month, all month. It’s all about me. I want a beer? “It’s’ my birthday month”. I want company to come visit? “It’s my birthday month”.

So far, there have been some highs and lows.

Highs:

  • See previous post.
  • LP and CM came up and hung out this weekend, I made myself a cake, had a bottle of wine.
  • We filmed some seriously silly Ski Utah videos (stay tuned).
  • I took a snowboarding lesson!

Lows:

  • Stupid Patriots.

SB is coming soon, with presents and promises for even more silly video making shenanigans. I can’t wait.We’ve even got tickets to see Ghostland Observatory and Das Racist.  Hopefully the rest of the month is as great as great as it’s started out. It will make me forget the getting older, entering (gasp) the last year of my twenties part.

Fast Forward

Time seems to be going by too fast. There’s no way I missed TWO Friday Fives! And my company is already gone? And we drove to Vegas and back already? I don’t even remember packing.

Maybe it’s getting old. Growing up must have something to do with it. We’re starting to feel like we’re running late! We want to be on our next house, our second kid, our new plans.

But right now is tons of fun.

Like everyone, I have to press pause, breathe deep, and let right now sink in; commit it to memory, and enjoy.

I swore last summer would be the best summer of my life, that we’d never be able to top it. And here we are, topping it.

Lazy No More

The fact is that while you were all jonesing for blog posts and wondering what was going on in Park City, I was working on my fitness.

MK and I joined the gym here. My friend CL has made it her personal mission to not only show me all the classes and skills the gym has to offer, but to torture me inside and out, and probably revel in how much better shape she is than me.

Our 4th of July weekend was tons of fun but a bit mellow. I was feeling a little off so I was glad we didn’t go too crazy. We cooked out several times with the B’s and the McH’s, played with the kiddos, and went to the local parade (pictures coming soon).

But Tuesday we felt like it wasn’t over. I went to an early tough workout class, so I was exhausted at the end of the afternoon, and we napped. We went over to a friends for drinks. Wednesday CL and I went to the pool. Our gym has a POOL.

Thursday we went for a huge hike up Deer Valley, then to lunch, then to our neighbors for an impromptu party. The whole week has felt like the holiday never ended…and that’s my FAVORITE!

Between the workout class and the hike, I realized that I am in terrible shape. Back to the hardcore challenging my body. Back to work(out)!

The Point

Of course the very first thing Momm asked last night is why I was bothering to waste words on this topic. I told her it happened, I think and feel things about it, and it’s cathartic to have this space to get out those feelings and thoughts. I mentioned it to MK, and he agreed with Momm. Apparently he wants me to blog about current events and real issues. But wait! I assured them both this was current and an issue.

My point for telling the story was so that you could help me out. The thing is, I am friends with quite a few people. And I’m in the middle of making a whole new set of friends, in my new home. I want to be the best person I can and put my best foot forward. I feel like right now I can’t do that unless I clean up my past. I remain in touch with so many people. I go to places they all are often. I meet up with them. I might even try to avoid them, only to run in to them since they are all friends with other friends. I embrace my past and love my friends, but I honestly do a kind of crappy job keeping in touch sometimes. It’s hard to call if you haven’t got something new and interesting, and you’re worried about old stuff being brought up.

Point is, the last 100,000 times that I’ve seen anyone that knows the story I told you, they bring it up. “Have you heard from DH?” “What ever happened to DH?” and if you follow my Twitter (you must, it’s on the right of this page over there) you know that it’s been four years. Four years and, what, six or seven addresses later? As if I’m going to ever ask anyone or look around or hear about her. I don’t want to. This is me moving on.

But these friends of mine, and I do believe they are good friends, always bring it up. I feel like asking them how they felt when their dog died or their neighbor got cancer. It’s just not appropriate. So blog buddies, how do I get over this? I thought maybe sharing the story with you might help me get over it. And it did. It’s something that happened to me though, it doesn’t just go away. So how do I ever convince these people to help me make it go away? I don’t want crap like this on my mind as I go out in the world meeting new people. It creates unwarranted misgivings. I want to get this old stuff off my mind, and open it to new people without worrying theyd hurt me in any similar way.

And Then…

So there we were. Me in full wedding mode, her offering to help and then letting me down, calling hangovers “allergy attacks” like I didn’t know better. Everything was happening so fast, and I was going to be married. I sent out shower invites. My mom came in. The day of, Mom and I got our hair and makeup done, and still no word from DH, person in charge of everything for the party. Snippy, correct me and remind me what I leave out – it’s hard to remember what you try to forget!

I am not good at parties. And it was mine, but I cared more about everyone else enjoying it. And still no word. Snippy saved the day as we mad dashed to Costco and the store you buy party crap at. Champagne, cake, and napkins later, we set up my aunt’s beautiful house. I was blocking it out then and I’m blocking it out now, so I don’t even remember what her story was. Just that she showed up like a guest, saw that we did it all without her, called it good, and lead the games. Games I was supposed to be thrilled over. But I just sat there. Deep breathing. Trying to enjoy how hideous I made the last minute plain white cake with nothing on it look with a big old frosting wedding date. Ew.

How could a friend do that? It’s not like leaving you hanging. That happens to everyone. It’s more like ruining a memory of a day that is supposed to be dear to your entire life. But I won’t let her win. She might have been there trying, but my real friends and family were there champagne toasting, sharing stories, giving me well wishes, taking silly pictures, and being SO NICE to my MIL ;). That’s all wins for me. It was a gorgeous day. I won’t forget what it was about and how loved I felt by everyone else in the house.

But I was spent. I was spinning. You kinda don’t get to do that and then think you’re still in the wedding (which of course she totally did). And she apologized. And she cried. And I got stuck at my house with an impromptu after party with people I’m 99% sure don’t read this, but just in case I can’t say what I really want to, other than she mislead all of them even more.

Without Snippy the wedding might not have happened. I was just so over it. She rescued me in the way only someone who knows pain and knows life must go on, even if it meant throwing me over a shoulder and carrying me through the ceremony. KD stepped up big time. SB never even complained when I called crying and said I needed her no matter what. Her hubby (boyfriend at the time) didn’t complain as he listened to me whine to her the whole night before the wedding. KD let me be angry. Snippy put together a wedding. I got hives, or something. Ugh.

I tried not to feel sorry for DH. Turns out she was just jealous. She wanted a man. Or something. I even pitied her way too much. This post was about her. A year after the wedding she still wasn’t on track. She became the first person I permanently tried to cut out of my life, for good.