Your injury stories are boring.
Your rehabilitation stories are boring.
So are mine. It’s not interesting to people that do what we do because we all test our limits. Everyone goes hard. Everyone breaks something. We all push and then we all suffer setbacks. Then we push again.
All I know is today I ran for the first time in years.
It hurt my pride maybe more than my body. I was self conscious. I was slow. I was in the middle of a city I don’t know.
But I did a few things. I woke up and I put clothes in a bag. I reached out for support and was supported. I turned loud music up, laced up my damn shoes, and suffered. I ran out of breath. I over thought the whole ordeal. And then, I did it. The doing was done. The high set in. The weak knees hurt, but they survived. I survived.
And maybe even that is boring. Most of us survive. Most of us break through the mental barrier. Most of us get back on the horse that kicked us off.
I’m happiest that no matter how long it took I attempted what I feared would be impossible, and I overcame odds and overcame myself. The physical pain I feared was nothing compared to what happened on the inside. That isn’t boring. That’s transformative.
This whole customizable watch thing is getting kind of fun, especially with my eccentric outfits.
I wrote a post all the way back in 2009 that still serves me. And the life changing yoga teachings remind me about it over and over. People and places and life can get in a rut and if you fall in the rut, you encourage the rut to continue. What you allow will continue. So LET GO.
People that were causing me pain, even if they didn’t know it, got let go. And I got lighter.
Sadness and pain and suffering can have a minute, but it has to let go. You have to let it. You can’t be angry with something you’re allowing. Don’t allow pain. Don’t allow bad behavior, yours or anyone else’s.
What is real courage? Is it doing things that are scary? Is it trusting your gut? Is it saying yes when you want to say no?
Maybe it’s saying no. To the people that drain you, the things that cause you harm. It can be really scary to say no to something that you fell in to but at the end of the day those things can take your most important asset away from you, your time. Toxic parts of your life are there because you allow them to be. You need to take the power and courage from within to end what does you harm.
No more excuses.
It pained me to look to the right and see that from 2006 to 2011 I lived here. Part time, but a lot of the time. I had a passion for sharing my words. For fun, I enjoyed it. It gave me joy.
My 2013 summary was a minute long. Four posts. Blogging about skiing even slowed. That was my JAM. And I blew it. No wonder mommy blogs are better, I got a job and had no more time for my PASSION.
I went skiing yesterday and my joy was back. I got through the hard stuff in my life and my joy was back. I was honest and hard on someone that disappointed me and my joy was back. I wrote. And wow was my joy back.
I’m really a copyCat. It’s funny, being a Cat and all. It fits me so well.
I read and read and read and present and past tense read/read like mad, voraciously. Then I adapt and copy. I try to tell everyone on social that you can be as good as who you like. Is that copying? To emulate?
I have gotten ahead of anything I imagined and fast, because I have answers. Because I read them.
Back to the reading and the writing. And the joy.