Freakish Success…Someday

I am afraid. And writing isn’t my job. But still I tried to show up ‘to my job’ as a writer. I rewrote my novel, the one that was more of a young girl dream, that I keep trying to make work. I am hoping that maybe I didn’t win the most recent book-publishing contest thingy I entered because it was someone else’s time.

Everything is so good for me these days I get afraid the bottom might fall out and I might lose an arm in my sleep. So it’s only fair to have one little thing that isn’t the way I want. I’m not a published author.

Mostly what’s holding me back is being so terrified of the world. Exposing my emotions about skiing for skiutah.com was harder than I ever imagined – people write shitty comments on blog posts on the internet. That’s lame. It makes me sad. Imagine if I self publish, and then people make mean comments on an even bigger forum, like amazon.com. Yikes.

I loved this TEDtalk Snippy sent me. Well, I only watched it a day later because I was bored. But THEN I loved it. I only didn’t like the lady because I was convinced Eat, Pray, Love was the book Snippy was meant to write, and that she would have killed it.

But, she’s a smart lady. Even if you aren’t a writer, listen to her thoughts. Some people are more creative than others, but I believe we all have a gift of something other than being good at a job, that we are meant to share.

It tells me that the fear and things I feel are real and normal. And I am creative. There will be people that never get that or think it’s worth it, but I can’t let THEM be the reason I don’t do something great.

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3 thoughts on “Freakish Success…Someday

  1. Don’t worry about the mean blog comments or Amazon comments. Did you ever notice that half of those mean commenters don’t know how to spell anything? And who are they to critique your writing if they don’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re.” Ignore them, and focus on the positive comments.

    (And now I will self-consciously proofread my comment to make sure nothing is misspelled. Like misspelled. Crap. One “s” or two?)

  2. Writeaubreywrite says it well. SGS, you have to write for you, and for your ideal reader. Everyone else will either teach you about their own limitations or jump on the bandwagon and enjoy the ride with you.

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