Okay, so maybe I wasn’t the best choice to act as steward of somegosoftly during CK’s road-trip. I failed to post yesterday, leaving somegosoftly’s dedicated readers to fend for themselves in cyberspace on the one day of the week when employers actually expect you to spend more time surfing the internet than working: Friday.
Instead of crafting something interesting, amusing or thought-provoking to publish on my good friend’s blog, I spent Friday cleaning my house from top to bottom in anticipation of the arrival of Very Special Friends from Dallas whom we haven’t seen in over a year. So much has changed in the year since we’ve seen the VSFfDs… the most notable is that we have created a new little person who lives with us and fills our days with sunshine and laughter. The VSFfDs have no children, and I feared the sight of my house — strewn with noisy, colorful toys, piles of laundry and dirty dishes, and elsewhere blanketed with a thick layer of dust — might forever postpone any plans they had of procreating. Hence Friday’s marathon house-cleaning project.
Toilets scrubbed to sparkling perfection, floors swiffered and mopped, all laundry folded and hidden away, I finally put my feet up and opened a beer. Too tired, I mumbled, too tired to blog tonight. Three beers later, I crawled into bed and fell fast asleep, confident that the VSFfDs would arrive tomorrow and think I was the perfect wife and mother– Just look at these toilets! they would exclaim, I think we could eat off of them!
Alas, no happy dreams awaited me. Instead, I woke with a start in the middle of the night, heart pounding and overwhelmed by guilt. You see, I dreamt that a lonely somegosoftly reader, distraught by the absence of a Friday post, had decided to shrug off this mortal coil… her suicide note: an eloquent goodbye posted as a comment on this blog. To that poor soul I can only say I’m sorry you had to die… but God are my toilets clean!