Ten Year Anniversary

2009 got me thinking. It’s officially been ten years now that I’ve been trying to not be retarded. Let me explain…

Once upon a time, in 1999, I was at the end of a rope. I hated everything in the world. I hadn’t had all that much fun in high school. I’m sure everyone has their own nightmare stories, but I had a consistently rough time from the moment I showed up until right when I said goodbye. It was so awful I graduated early to run away from the problems I had no idea how to overcome.

To be fair, I had been an unpopular brainy dork with glasses and braces and only good intentions since middle school. And there were so many things that happened to me I still don’t understand the reasons for. Friends becoming enemies, people hurting me, all that drama. I thought high school in a new town would save me. It was just as bad. There were a lot of things I did wrong myself (boys! band! student council!?!?!) so I blame myself a bit.

But after the dumbest guidance counselor ever telling me that “high school was the best and most important time of my life, I should get better at it” I decided to leave. Thanks to my parents realizing how miserable I was, and an aunt that thought I’d be good – I went to Texas.

Everyone also has that eye opening college experience, but this is my story so be nice. Moving to a new place, meeting new people, getting to be who I wanted made me so excited. I think I flourished. I met great people, had great roommates, experienced what life was like without people hurting me. And I don’t think it takes a college degree to figure out that was what I was looking for. I worked hard. I am a louder, wackier person now, but I’m me and my friends like me for being just that me. I feel so loved. I kept those friends, made new ones. I grew up, and I turned out okay. And to be sure, high school was not the most important time of my life. I’ve come a long way since then. It only took ten years to figure out the problem wasn’t me.

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